This is technology???

So, my telephone stopped working this morning. All you get when you call is a busy signal. This should make me happy since no one can call me and I hate to talk on the phone anyway, because I can never think of anything to say, and none of my friends call me anyway because I must be terribly boring because I can never think of anything to say............that's true. Obviously, I am much better talking to myself.

Anyway, I had to get it fixed. How do you get the phone fixed, you say.? Why, you call the phone company of course!! The problem with that is ever since Ma Bell was broken up because we thought she was a monopoly, (You young'uns don't remember this I am sure, but there was a time that there was only one supplier of telephone service: Bell Telephone. We could blame everything on them. They took it well and fixed our service when it was down. It worked quite nicely. One bill, one service, no complications. We didn't even own the phones! And they NEVER broke! You could throw those babies against a wall!) it has become more and more confusing as to who does what to whom. I have 2 telephone lines into my home. I also have a telephone line in PA that rings into one of my Delaware numbers. I also have 5 cell phones. (Why?) These services are billed to me by Verizon, Cingular, Nextel, and MCI...........I called AT&T to get my telephone line fixed. Wasn't Verizon and AT&T the same at one time? Didn't AT&T merge with Cingular? Doesn't that make them all the same company? So I called. I was told by an automated voice to please give my name, telephone number with area code, address, age, yearly income, number of dependents and do I want to continue in Spanish.....The Voice-O-Matic then told me I would have a 7 minute waiting period until I could speak to a representative. Seven full minutes with elevator music and a repetative message every 30 seconds telling me how much my call meant to them and please don't hang up because if you do, you go to the back of the line. All the while, I knew that when I finally got to speak to a representative that I would have the wrong number...and I did. When my friendly representatve came on the line I had to repeat to her the same information I had already given to Voice-O-Matic. Why in the world do we have to repeat the same things over and over and over? You cannot convince me that there is no way to transfer information that you have already spoken into the system to the person handling your call. Of course the words came that I knew would come, "I am sorry, we don't handle your service; it says here that you have Verizon local services." How can they know that, but I don't?
I was polite.
Me:"Can you give me a number that I can call?
Them: "I don't think so."
Me: "You have no idea of who I can call?"
Them: "No, Do you have a recent bill?"
Me: "Not at hand."
Them:"I would be glad to open an account with you for your services now. We can give you a good bundled package."
Me: "Huh? No, I just want my phone fixed."
Them: "Are you sure? We have a good package that includes.....(I stopped listening)
Me: (Still polite with an edge) "No thank you, I just want to get my phone fixed. Can you give me a number to call?"
Them:"Let me check."
Me: "Thank you. " Moron...that was in my head.
Them: "The number you can try is....
Me: "Thank you."
Them: "Are you sure we can't set-up a local program for you? Is there anything else I can do for you today?"
Me:"No, I appreciate your help."
Now, you know they knew that number the whole time, but I was proud of myself, I didn't explode, but I almost broke the phone when I hung it up. I have to admit they were quite nice, so I couldn't be rude.
My phone is still broken, I will give you the repair story with my next installment.