Sometimes I wish that I didn't have agency. Agency to choose for myself. I sometimes wish that my decisions could be made for me and that I could avoid the consequence of making poor or incorrect choices. I sometimes wish that. However, in my heart of hearts, I know without a doubt that that is wrong. What is life without the ability to choose for yourself? Some will try and tell you that there are those in the world that do not have the ability to choose, but I disagree. Even those that have had the most basic of life's decisions taken away from their control still have the ultimate choice. I remember reading a story of a person that had been in a concentration camp and they brought up this very tenent. He (or she, I cant remember) made the point that the only thing the camp could not take from him/her was the choice to be who they were, what they would choose to think, how they would choose to react, what they would choose to say. Very powerful lesson.
Sometimes I choose poorly. (Makes me think of Indiana Jones) Sometimes I choose more wisely. (Definitely Indiana Jones now) But the whole point of choice is progression. An egg without a little bit of heat added to it is not particularly appetizing. It is still healthy, but it hasn't met its potential.
I guess what I really wish is that choices were easy. I want the potential of the egg without the heat. I don't want to make decisions between 2 things that are equally good and desirable but are mutually exclusive in attaining. I don't want consequence. But not wanting that does not take away facing the reality that I must make the choice. Maybe the bigger the choice the bigger the growth that comes from it. I can only hope.
Decision today? Not facing the big ones yet, but I did decide to have a piece of danish over cottage cheese....I think that was a poor choice......the only growth that comes from that is in my hips.
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
Monday, May 17, 2010
So where do I go from here??
You ever feel like you are at the end of a road and you're are not really sure which way to go? I am antsy, I need a change, but I can't for the life of me figure out what it is I want.
I believe that staying the same is not a choice. We move either forward or backward, but you cannot stay in the same place. What is the point? Comfort? Familiarity? I hear a lot of talk in my ever changing choice of profession that we have to move out of our comfort zone and embrace new ways of working. (Translation: Get with the program or move on.) We also have to do that in our lives. Move out of the comfort zone, get out there and do something!! Pick something in your life and improve it, change it, break it open and see what new level you can reach. In order to do that, however, risk is involved, and, let's face it, taking risk when you absolutely do not have to, is pretty scary.
Life-altering change can be positive OR negative. The problem with life-altering change is that it is not something that affects just one person. Life-altering change can take in its tidal wave your family, your friends, your reputation and your future. When that is in the positive flow, it can be one of the the most rewarding events in your life. Not so much in the negative flow. When it is selfishly considered it is destructive. We live in a time when it is acceptable to think only of yourself and do what is right for ME. In reality, that has never been the right choice. You can see the litter of broken hearts, broken promises, irreparable rifts in love and affection, bewildered children, and painful regret throughout our society.
The best change comes when you take steps to improve what you have, to devote yourself entirely to going forward in change that will bolster and underscore what is good about a relationship, a job, a philosophy. I don't and never will promote staying in those places that have a destructive element whether in the home or outside the home, but we so easily give up on things when it becomes difficult, or when you think something far far better has come along. If we focus outward instead of inward we will become more willing to be unselfish, to be more responsible, more able to see what we can contribute to the betterment of individuals, families, and community. We won't leave the aforementioned litter in our lives.
I don't want to sound like a martyr, I firmly believe we should seek the things that bring us joy; however, it should be done within the proper bounds; bounds that we have set as we have moved through life's decisions. Bounds that are drawn by our beliefs and value sytems. Sacrifice of ones own selfish desires is good when put in that perspective. To quote a hymn, "sacrifice brings forth the blessings of heaven".
So, it looks like I have come full circle. I want a change, I need a change. Life-altering change? Only if it promotes what is good in my life. Sacrifice change? If it brings happiness to those around me. What thing shall I break open in order to have meaningful change? Still teetering on a rock about that one.
I believe that staying the same is not a choice. We move either forward or backward, but you cannot stay in the same place. What is the point? Comfort? Familiarity? I hear a lot of talk in my ever changing choice of profession that we have to move out of our comfort zone and embrace new ways of working. (Translation: Get with the program or move on.) We also have to do that in our lives. Move out of the comfort zone, get out there and do something!! Pick something in your life and improve it, change it, break it open and see what new level you can reach. In order to do that, however, risk is involved, and, let's face it, taking risk when you absolutely do not have to, is pretty scary.
Life-altering change can be positive OR negative. The problem with life-altering change is that it is not something that affects just one person. Life-altering change can take in its tidal wave your family, your friends, your reputation and your future. When that is in the positive flow, it can be one of the the most rewarding events in your life. Not so much in the negative flow. When it is selfishly considered it is destructive. We live in a time when it is acceptable to think only of yourself and do what is right for ME. In reality, that has never been the right choice. You can see the litter of broken hearts, broken promises, irreparable rifts in love and affection, bewildered children, and painful regret throughout our society.
The best change comes when you take steps to improve what you have, to devote yourself entirely to going forward in change that will bolster and underscore what is good about a relationship, a job, a philosophy. I don't and never will promote staying in those places that have a destructive element whether in the home or outside the home, but we so easily give up on things when it becomes difficult, or when you think something far far better has come along. If we focus outward instead of inward we will become more willing to be unselfish, to be more responsible, more able to see what we can contribute to the betterment of individuals, families, and community. We won't leave the aforementioned litter in our lives.
I don't want to sound like a martyr, I firmly believe we should seek the things that bring us joy; however, it should be done within the proper bounds; bounds that we have set as we have moved through life's decisions. Bounds that are drawn by our beliefs and value sytems. Sacrifice of ones own selfish desires is good when put in that perspective. To quote a hymn, "sacrifice brings forth the blessings of heaven".
So, it looks like I have come full circle. I want a change, I need a change. Life-altering change? Only if it promotes what is good in my life. Sacrifice change? If it brings happiness to those around me. What thing shall I break open in order to have meaningful change? Still teetering on a rock about that one.
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