Have Cucumber....Will Travel Part 1

OK, if you don't get the title to this post you are not old....or you are not a 60's television buff....

But ANYWAY, I recently got an email that excitedly proclaimed the wonderful uses of the ordinary cucumber. Yes, my friends, the simple cucumber that prolifically grows in home gardens around the world! The mighty cucumber.....Really?? When I was growing up, the cucumber was the one thing I could get my dad to make a face over. He hates cucumbers...... still does to this day, so do my husband and children. I, on the other hand, love cucumbers, so I was intrigued by this email on the powers of the cuke. So I am going to go over the list (there are 12 in the list I will do the first 6; the last 6 will have to come in the next episode) and you can tell me what you think. I, of course, will tell you what I think.

#1. Cucumbers contain most of the vitamins you need every day, just one cucumber contains Vitamin B1, Vitamin B2, Vitamin B3, Vitamin B5, Vitamin B6, Folic Acid, Vitamin C, Calcium, Iron, Magnesium, Phosphorus, Potassium and Zinc.

OK, What size cucumber are you talking here? They come in every shape and size. Fat with a lot of seeds? Skinny with more flesh? Long? Short? With or without the peel? That makes a big difference! (You know it's with the peel; I am ambivalent about cucumber peels....if it's that waxy junk from the store, no thanks, if it's fresh from the garden, OK, but ya really gotta scrub it.) If you don't like the peel, you have lost most of what it purports to be! And what variety of cucumber? ....Come on, you don't expect me to believe this do you? Who exactly measures the nutrients of a cucumber? There's a lot of water in it you know. Have you ever left a cucumber in the fridge so long it just disintegrates? Really nasty...It looks OK and then you reach for it and it squishes into a mess. Ever freeze a cucumber? Not good....

#2. Feeling tired in the afternoon, put down the caffeinated soda and pick up a cucumber. Cucumbers are a good source of B Vitamins and Carbohydrates that can provide that quick pick- me -up that can last for hours.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! Give me a Snickers..........I'll live with the inevitable crash!

#3. Tired of your bathroom mirror fogging up after a shower? Try rubbing a cucumber slice along the mirror, it will eliminate the fog and provide a soothing, spa-like fragrance.

My bathroom mirror is huge.....I am a macro cleaner....big paper towels, lots of spray, and wide strokes of the arm.......Can you just see me holding a little slice of cucumber rubbing it across the surface of my mirror just to keep it from fogging? I don't want to see myself after a shower anyway...And sorry, one slice of cucumber will not make my bathroom smell like a spa.........Febreeze on steroids will not make my bathroom smell like a spa.....

#4. Are grubs and slugs ruining your planting beds? Place a few slices in a small pie tin and your garden will be free of pests all season long. The chemicals in the cucumber react with the aluminum to give off a scent undetectable to humans but drive garden pests crazy and make them flee the area.

OK, salt on the slugs, and it's a visible lesson in osmosis......plus, I don't think garden pests have noses.....

#5 Looking for a fast and easy way to remove cellulite before going out or to the pool? Try rubbing a slice or two of cucumbers along your problem area for a few minutes, the phytochemicals in the cucumber cause the collagen in your skin to tighten, firming up the outer layer and reducing the visibility of cellulite. Works great on wrinkles too!!!

I got nothing here.....I mean, really, rubbing cucumber slices on my cellulite?? First of all, no one that has enough cellulite to worry about should be wearing clothing that may expose it....In the case of a bathing suit, who cares? EVERYONE knows themselves well enough on this issue...you either:

• Look great and flaunt it
• Think you look great and flaunt it
• Look fat/thin/scrawny/too tan/blazing white/freckly/short/tall/bulgy and don't care
• NEVER wear a bathing suit because you don't want to make anyone go blind.

I think most of humanity fits in under the 3rd bullet point. I have spent a lifetime looking around and let's face it, there are no naturally living people that are 10's....The only scale that should be important to you is the one you have of yourself, I am about a 3, but my kids think I am somewhere between 7-10 depending on the day. (Well, not in a bathing suit....) That's good enough for me. How long can a cucumber scrub last anyway? You go in the pool looking tight and when you come out you got dimples from head to toe?? (And do men care about cellulite? Do they get cellulite? See?? We don't even notice! Many men can put on a speedo and strut around like the cock of the hen house! That would be bullet point 2.)

#6. Want to avoid a hangover or terrible headache? Eat a few cucumber slices before going to bed and wake up refreshed and headache free. Cucumbers contain enough sugar, B vitamins and electrolytes to replenish essential nutrients the body lost, keeping everything in equilibrium, avoiding both a hangover and headache!!

Yeah, right......I can see it now, stumbling into the kitchen to eat a cucumber after a night out partying. Who really wants a drunk to have a knife in their hand ready to slice up veggies to prevent a hangover/headache? And....Yumm, eating cucumbers on top of buffalo wings, beer, Mohitos, Margaritas, nachos, and chili...The only thing a cucumber might add is something to the color palette when it gets barfed up. If you are sober enough to slice and eat a cucumber after being out drinking, you won't have a hangover anyway.

Knowing these things doesn't change my attitude toward the simple cucumber, I will still eat it, but I won't smear it on my mirrors or my thighs, will not try to tighten up those wrinkles around my eyes (sleep, something that I have a hard time doing, helps more), use it as a room freshener or test it out to see if I can tie one on and not suffer the consequences. But I will keep these things in mind, just in case I get as bored as the person who put this list together did.

RIP Green Car......

So, I was on call this past Thursday night (Editors note: This happened May 20th, not last Thursday) when my car decided that it had had enough. It decided that it was comfortable in its "place of park" and refused to move. I arrived to see my last patient of the night and returned to my car at about 11:15 pm. Deciding that I would finish all my charting on the computer before driving home, I plugged in and started tapping away on all my patients. About 45 minutes in, all the lights in my car gave a sudden surge and then dimmed. It was enough for me to think "What the heck just happened?" Now, usually when I work on the computer in my car, the car is running because I am doing clean up work on whatever chart is up. Tonight, I had major notes to write because I had been going from one patient to the next without taking time to chart.

Anyway, I reached for the keys and tried to turn over the ignition. That awful sound of "clicktey click" and then nothing. What the heck had I done? That sound reminded me of starters going bad, but my first thought was that I had killed the battery because I had not had the car running while I had the computer running. NOT good.....it's midnight, and I'm not done charting either...OK, so what do I notice? Well, because I have been up 19 hours, the light of intelligence was dim. There was something going on in the car that was just not congruent with what I thought was the matter. Let's see, battery dead....battery dead....battery dead..... but something else was telling me differently. Finally it dawned on me! There were still dim lights on in the car! The clock light was on, when I opened the door the interior light came on, and the headlights were automatic when I tried to start the car......sooooooo what exactly does that mean??? Focus girl, you can figures this out!! Oh yeah, the battery must not be dead, or at least must not be all the way dead. Did I mention that I had rolled down my electric windows cause it was a beautiful night and the car was stuffy? Yeah, well, they wouldn't go up now. No sweat! I will sit here and wait for the battery to recharge.....Can I do that??? Don't I remember that if you give it a chance it will beef up again, or recharge from the alternator, or have a magic wire infuse it with juice or something? I will just sit tight. I am in a lighted parking lot, it is 12:15 am, and as long as I don't get a call, I will be alright. OK.....waiting.....waiting....waiting.... Have I ever mentioned that I have the patience of an ant? Let me try this again. Turn the ignition and HEY!!! it didn't clickity click .......it actually gave a little chug......before it died again with no sound at all. OK, OK, I will give it a LOT of time to do whatever it is it does to juice up again. I'll give it an HOUR...that ought to do it. Waiting......waiting......waiting......maybe 5 minutes will do it. Smaller chug to nothingness....OK. Someone is coming out of the facility....

Me: "Do you have jumper cables?" I ask.

Them: "Is your car not starting?"

Me: In thought: "No, I just really need to know if you have jumper cables, I'm taking a survey for Auto Digest."

Me: "Yeah, I think I need a jump."

Them: "Sorry, I don't have any, you may want to check inside to see if anyone may have some."

Me: In thought: "Go to ...."

Me: "OK, thank you , I will do that, have a good night."

No need for me to go inside...........If I am patient, this car will start....... 12:30, 12:40.......AGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH! Somebody SHOOT me! I don't want to call my husband. I am 25 miles away and it's early in the morning, and he is usually fast asleep by 10:00.......I call him anyway.

Me: "The car is dead."

Him: " Oh boy, you want me come and get you?"

Me: "No, no, I am going to go inside and see if anyone has some jumper cables." Translation; "Please come and get me, I'm tired and I want to go home. Car stuff is your thing...I just drive."

SOOOOOOO I go back into the facility...... mind you, I left the patient an hour and half ago and the shift has changed....

Me: "Can I get in, please?"

Them: "Why do you need to get in?"

Me: " I was just in seeing a patient and my car died and now I need to ask if anyone has jumper cables." Translation: Let me in or I will tear your head off your shoulders, I am just that grouchy....

Them: " I don't think anyone has any jumper cables. We don't usually let anyone in at this time of night. I don't remember you seeing any patient."

Me: In thought: "Go to ....!!"

Me: " I know, I have been out here for awhile. Can I just go through to security and ask if they have any cables?"

Them: "SIIIGGGHHH...I guess so."

Me: In thought: "Go To .... Now"

Me: "Thank you so much, I appreciate it!"

So I walk from the nursing home side allllllll the way to the assisted living side to the one lone security guard that has a walkie talkie.

Me: "Excuse me, can you tell me if there may be any jumper cables available anywhere on the site?"

Him: "Jumper Cables??"

Me: In Thought: "Why is this so freaking hard to understand???"

Me: "Yes, my car has died and I was wondering if you had any jumper cables." Which now that I think back, makes me think even if they had had them, who would have given me a jump? Certainly none on these guys!!!

Him: "Well, let me see if anyone knows."

He then proceeds to use his walkie talkie to page ONE guy........

Him: "Hey, Joe (or whatever his name was), do we have any jumper cables?"

Joe: "Jumper cables??"

Me: WAAAAHHHHHH!!!!

Him: "Yeah"

Joe: "I don't think so."

Him: "Sorry, we don't have any jumper cables."

Did I mention that both these guys had that cool Nigerian accent?? I don't think either one of them knew what jumper cables were......

So I walk allllllll the way back to the nursing home side.

Woman Who Didn't Want To Let Me In: "Did they have any?"

Me: In thought: "Bite Me!"

Me: " No, I'm afraid not."

Woman Who Didn't Want To Let Me In: "I didn't think so."

Me: Just keep walking or they will haul you away for murder......

So now it's after 1:00 in the morning and I call back husband, who had actually stayed up and had been waiting for me to come home before the first call.

Me: "Well, no one has any jumper cables."

Him: "You want me to come and get you?"

Me:"Well...."

Him: "Or do you want to call AAA?"

Me: ???????????????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Why did I totally forget that I had AAA???? And WHY did husband let me go on a cable chase??? For crying out loud, let me call AAA.

So, since I couldn't find my AAA card, I wrote down the number, (which you really don't need, all you gotta do is give them your name.) and made the call.

Within 30 minutes, My Hero had arrived. He wanted me to put the car in neutral so he could push it back , but my car won't come out of park because you have to step on the brake to move it out of park, and the brakes are power brakes and with no power it doesn't engage, and.....well suffice it to say it stayed where it was. Thankfully the person that came out of the facility way back a long time ago when I first asked for jumper cables, had vacated the spot next to my car and My Hero's big truck just fit into the space to reach me. It took a few minutes, but it did start.

My Hero told me that the battery needed to be replaced.........Really??? Well now, I must look into that......

So, with my engine running, My Hero took off. I sat there just wanting the electrical juice to infuse to a steady state before I left. I put the car in reverse, backed up 6 feet, and it started sputtering and coughing like an 80 year old with bronchitis. Every time I eased off the gas, it would give a violent leap and cough.....definitely a death rattle.........My Hero was now a Big Fat Jerk for leaving me there without making sure that I could drive that car.....And I gave him 10 bucks!

I attempted to pull back into the safety of the parking spot, but to no avail......My 2000 hunter green Buick Regal, gave a shudder, a spit, and went peacefully to the Other Side....

I call back husband........

Me: "The car is dead."

Him: "What happened?"

Me: "Big Fat Jerk jumped car, car started, Big Fat Jerk left, car died"

Him: "I'll come and get you."

Me:" I'll be here."

So here I sit in the middle of the drive space at about 2 in the morning, waiting for husband to come and get me. At one point a car pulls AROUND me and flips his lights, as if I am sitting there on purpose....well, I am sitting there on purpose, but you know what I mean...he didn't even stop......Course, it could have been the sight of a wild-haired crazy-eyed blond, with smudges of 22 hour-old make up smeared across her face that scared the bejeebies out of him as the lights crossed my countenance that made him continue on without stopping......

So husband comes, sees the car in the middle of the road and says we can't leave the car there. Solution??? We need to call AAA again. Now it's about 2:30 in the morning. Another call to AAA brings My Hero #2 out to the facility with a flat bed. I'm sitting in husbands truck...I don't care if I ever see the car again.......I just want to go home. Hero # 2 follows us home with the car. Another 10 bucks to Hero# 2. Now it's 3:30 in the morning, I have been up for 23 hours, (no problem, I am good for 36, I just talk funny.)

So how do I end this? Just saying "I went to bed." seems anticlimactic. Oh! I know! I will tell you what the mechanic said when husband took it in for repair....

Along with its other ailments, a tie rod that was almost shot was ready to break and could have sent me, as the mechanic put it, "out of control into a crash and a fiery death." After putting this on FaceBook, this comment was made:

"Cool! Given the choice, I'd rather have words like "out of control" and "fiery death" in my obituary than "injuries related to rolling off the couch while watching TV."

I love that perspective!!!

Walk a mile in my shoes....

I came upstairs with my arms full and said to my companion "I picked up 7 pairs of shoes by the front door!". He said to me, "Yea, well did you go into the family room yet?" Hmmmm...Did I mention all 7 pairs of shoes were mine? They usually don't get far from the front door cause they are the first things that come off when I walk in at night.

You are talking to a woman who used to have 2 pairs of shoes..... 2 pairs of $5.00 shoes. Shoes to go outside in and shoes to go to work in. I had to take care of them and know where I put them casue there were no substitutes. I can remember going through the house saying "Do you know where my shoes are??" Hmmmm.....I may still do that....

I wouldn't buy shoes that were not cheap, and I must admit, my poor dogs paid the price.

Just a little side question before I go on...Is it 2 pairs of shoes or 2 pair of shoes (or 2 pairs of shoe) ??

Back in our poor days, living on military pay and my outstanding $2.00 an hour pay,

(Yes. I said $2.00 an hour...and I ran the office, took DICTATION, TYPED on a TYPEWRITER without the glorious disappearing backspace or spell check, kept the books, and everything else that needed to be done WITHOUT the help of anything digital, computerized, or instant, I even balanced the bosses checkbook! He used to say "If you get it within a $100.00, I'm happy." Do you have any idea what $100.00 was to me in 1973?? I was afraid to be out by 5 cents cause I could take it down to the penny some weeks. OK, off track....)

I would buy nothing but the bare necessities. I knew the difference between a need and a want. I needed some things, I wanted a lot of things; I didn't get my wants, and my needs were barely met, but I was happy! No one else I knew had anything either, and there was far less to covet then than there is now. So shoes were a necessity, but a lot of shoes were not a necessity. Like I said, 1 pair for outside and 1 pair for work, and barefoot the rest of the time. It was hot in Florida, I didn't need shoes unless I was going to be where the critters would bite me.

It took me 20 years to realize that I could have more shoes and they didn't have to be $5.00 shoes. When I was in my forties, I finally decided to have ingrown toenails removed on both my big toes. For years I suffered with shoes that hurt my feet and toes that were so tender, I couldn't bear to touch them. Then one day I realized I could get that fixed. Why didn't I realize it before?? Who knows, I just thought having ingrown toenails removed was a want and not a need. So for the first time, I didn't have pain in my toes when I walked, and now I could buy some shoes.

It started out innocently enough. I bought a black pair of shoes, cause black shoes are sensible and go with everything. Then a pair of beige shoes, cause in the summer beige shoes are better than black shoes..... Guess what, the world did not come to a screeching halt because I spent some money on myself. I was a little intoxicated with the fact that no one told me I was a bad mother or wife because I was wearing TWO DIFFERENT pairs (of pair) of shoes in one week. Then, like most things that feel nice and start out innocently, it became a bit obsessive. To buy or not to buy? Know what BOGO is? Oh yeah, buy one get one half price......So I will get 2 pair. I mean I'm saving money right??? Well if I buy 2, why not 4?? That's like getting a free pair of shoes! That means that 6 pair must be even better!!

Slings and heels, pumps and peek-a-boo toes, flip flops, sandals, sneakers, flats, stuff to match clothes, stuff to match purses, summer colors, winter colors. Now what I used to not even see when I went into a store seemed to jump out at me and say "Take me home, you know you love me!"

What happened, however, was that my feet still hurt. I began to believe that it didn't matter what type of shoe I wore, it hurt me. I would always buy wide shoes.....And then one day it dawned on me, I saw it, I looked at my feet........I had odd feet, REALLY odd feet. Now while I could always find what I thought was comfortable in a wide shoe, I noticed that my feet were freakishly wide, really wide, like, people I got man feet. EWWWWW how wide are these dogs for crying out loud???

Never fear! In the day of instant information, I found a place.......a heavenly place......a place for shoes that go to 4E width. I bought a pair of winter boots that, oooolala, look good on me and do not make me walk like a cripple at the end of the day. Red pumps....Oh, how I love my red shoes! I only wear them with certain things, but people notice my red shoes. Shooties that look like snake skin...yummy looking with those spike heels! And, guess what? I actually went down a half size, because now, my big fat wide feet spread across instead of lengthwise. The price? Well let's just say that when you have wide feet (or narrow feet for that matter.....my mother-in-law wore a 12 AA, she understood the meaning of special shoes) that you need to pay a special price. $5.00 dollars has turned into $50.00 minimum on up to....well, you can pay a lot for good quality shoes. I try to wait for the clearance sales. If you were to look in my closet, you would see that I really am not as bad as some women; for me, it seems excessive, to others I may be just a beginner, I won't go over that bridge to the sex-in-the-city-girl expensive shoes, I have not evolved that far, I have grandchildren you know....But I don't want anyone questioning my grandmotherly skills because I like to wear sexy shoes. (And good shoes, not sensible shoes BTW, can make you feel sexy, you know.)

So, I went into the family room....6 more pairs of shoes.... dining room, 1 more pair....living room.....Ah! Shoe-free zone!...... and as I sit here at my desk, I count 3 more pair under it. Well, at least I won't be asking where my shoes are....I may ask where my blue flip-flops that match my new shirt are...but I can always substitute.

Turkey Necks...

So, I was sitting at lunch with my friends today, all of us about the same age, and we were talking about turkey necks....You know, that neck thing you get when you get older, and the one thing they can't seem to fix with plastic surgery. You know, your neck is a little saggy, a little wrinkled, looks like a.....well, it looks like a turkey neck. The comments were around why can't we do something for it?? You know, we could make a lot of money if we could figure a way to fix it.

Then one of my friends said something like this.."I hate that no one says 'you don't look your age' anymore, or 'Gee, you CAN'T have kids that age' or 'You look good for your age'. She followed with something like this.. "I hate that I want to do so much and I feel that I don't have the time anymore. I can see my limited time left just ticking down." It stopped me right in my tracks.....

First of all, my friend looks great "for her age"!! I think she is attractive. She has a quick mind and a great sense of humor. She is a great conversationalist, and fun to be around; but as we continued the conversation, I was dismayed that she and my other mature friend thought that they were invisible to the world, that they are not noticed because they are older and perceived to be uninteresting. Well that may be true in the world's eye, but....

I couldn't disagree more.

I gotta say the most interesting people I know are in my age range. That's not to say that younger people are not interesting, they are, but in a different way. I find them to be interesting because they are finding their way, sorting through decisions of life, parenthood, relationships, and work. I like their perspectives and I like hearing their hopes and how they deal with the bumps in their life. Happily, I find that they are, in many cases, better equipped than I ever was when I was a young wife and mother.

I like to, and I do, surround myself with people of all ages. I especially love children because they see heart to heart rather than face to face. If I want an honest opinion, I ask a child. They will always tell me the truth. Case in point, my grandson Luke, told his mother the following:

Luke: "Mommy, I'm all done being patient"

Jessica: "What are you talking about, Luke."

Luke: "I'm talking about being all done being patient with all your yucky dinners."

Refreshing, isn't it? Let me just say that Jessica does not make yucky dinners, but if she did, I would remain patient. I can remember when my children were young they used to look into my face and say "Mommy, you look like a movie star." Then half hour later, "I can't see around you mommy, your bottom is too big." It's all about balance, I guess.

But for sheer breadth of life experience, I find those that are my age and older bring a perspective to conversation that I enjoy. Sometimes words are not even necessary, a look will tell a story. We don't rely on our physical prowess or our good looks to try and impress, (yeah, I know, because it doesn't work anymore) but NOW, we can say something with confidence, and people will believe us, even if it is a crock. Our sense of humor is a little more twisted, and even if our shoulders are a little more bent, they hold sorrows much better. We have been seasoned with the salt of life and infused with the flavorful juices of experience. Some of us have turned out yucky, to use my grandsons word, but more have turned out delightfully delicious.

But I still want to do something about my turkey neck.

The whole world at my fingertips!

I have a new phone. I finally got an iPhone. I have been wanting one since my youngest showed me hers. I have been playing with this phone for the last 2 days, and I can't seem to put it down.

Not so unusual you say? Well, considering I used to leave my phone sitting around until it was dead, not knowing where it was, and looking frantically for it when I was about to go on call, I would say that this is a change. Before I took the jump to the iPhone, I had begun using my Blackberry more, and getting to be lighting fast with a text message. I carried it around on my hip like a sheriff carries his .44. I am officially the geek of which I used to make fun.

I could never understand why people walked around with their eyes down into their palms, missing out on what was going on around them and laughing to themselves like they were part of some cosmic joke. Heaven help me I caught myself doing it!!!

I will say this; I am not too comfortable being this involved with my phone. When I do look up, I see that I have missed some things. I am almost always working from a list of things to do. My list has dust on it and my personal projects and work projects have been laying idle. My new ideas are sitting in my brain veiled behind new apps that I just have to have. But really, isn't this supposed to help us work smarter, not harder?? I do love some of the applications that make life easier, but do I REALLY need mobile Facebook?? (I have it) Do I REALLY need my email to my phone?? (I have it) Do I REALLY need Skype? (Oh yes, have it)

Need to get back to my garden, my interface with real people, and my never ending What Next? list. BTW, my what next includes a new foundation and nurse networking group for community health. Been trying to work on that for 3 years now, just need to put it together. So hopefully, this new iphone will support those things rather than keep me drooling into the virtual keyboard.

With every new technology comes potential for greater good or greater slavery to the tool.

Hey, I just found an app on how to hypnotize, oooo.....there's a whole category on medicine, and look at this! A productivity category........Oops, a little bit of drool goin on.....!

Choose ye this day.............

Sometimes I wish that I didn't have agency. Agency to choose for myself. I sometimes wish that my decisions could be made for me and that I could avoid the consequence of making poor or incorrect choices. I sometimes wish that. However, in my heart of hearts, I know without a doubt that that is wrong. What is life without the ability to choose for yourself? Some will try and tell you that there are those in the world that do not have the ability to choose, but I disagree. Even those that have had the most basic of life's decisions taken away from their control still have the ultimate choice. I remember reading a story of a person that had been in a concentration camp and they brought up this very tenent. He (or she, I cant remember) made the point that the only thing the camp could not take from him/her was the choice to be who they were, what they would choose to think, how they would choose to react, what they would choose to say. Very powerful lesson.

Sometimes I choose poorly. (Makes me think of Indiana Jones) Sometimes I choose more wisely. (Definitely Indiana Jones now) But the whole point of choice is progression. An egg without a little bit of heat added to it is not particularly appetizing. It is still healthy, but it hasn't met its potential.

I guess what I really wish is that choices were easy. I want the potential of the egg without the heat. I don't want to make decisions between 2 things that are equally good and desirable but are mutually exclusive in attaining. I don't want consequence. But not wanting that does not take away facing the reality that I must make the choice. Maybe the bigger the choice the bigger the growth that comes from it. I can only hope.

Decision today? Not facing the big ones yet, but I did decide to have a piece of danish over cottage cheese....I think that was a poor choice......the only growth that comes from that is in my hips.

So where do I go from here??

You ever feel like you are at the end of a road and you're are not really sure which way to go? I am antsy, I need a change, but I can't for the life of me figure out what it is I want.

I believe that staying the same is not a choice. We move either forward or backward, but you cannot stay in the same place. What is the point? Comfort? Familiarity? I hear a lot of talk in my ever changing choice of profession that we have to move out of our comfort zone and embrace new ways of working. (Translation: Get with the program or move on.) We also have to do that in our lives. Move out of the comfort zone, get out there and do something!! Pick something in your life and improve it, change it, break it open and see what new level you can reach. In order to do that, however, risk is involved, and, let's face it, taking risk when you absolutely do not have to, is pretty scary.

Life-altering change can be positive OR negative. The problem with life-altering change is that it is not something that affects just one person. Life-altering change can take in its tidal wave your family, your friends, your reputation and your future. When that is in the positive flow, it can be one of the the most rewarding events in your life. Not so much in the negative flow. When it is selfishly considered it is destructive. We live in a time when it is acceptable to think only of yourself and do what is right for ME. In reality, that has never been the right choice. You can see the litter of broken hearts, broken promises, irreparable rifts in love and affection, bewildered children, and painful regret throughout our society.

The best change comes when you take steps to improve what you have, to devote yourself entirely to going forward in change that will bolster and underscore what is good about a relationship, a job, a philosophy. I don't and never will promote staying in those places that have a destructive element whether in the home or outside the home, but we so easily give up on things when it becomes difficult, or when you think something far far better has come along. If we focus outward instead of inward we will become more willing to be unselfish, to be more responsible, more able to see what we can contribute to the betterment of individuals, families, and community. We won't leave the aforementioned litter in our lives.

I don't want to sound like a martyr, I firmly believe we should seek the things that bring us joy; however, it should be done within the proper bounds; bounds that we have set as we have moved through life's decisions. Bounds that are drawn by our beliefs and value sytems. Sacrifice of ones own selfish desires is good when put in that perspective. To quote a hymn, "sacrifice brings forth the blessings of heaven".

So, it looks like I have come full circle. I want a change, I need a change. Life-altering change? Only if it promotes what is good in my life. Sacrifice change? If it brings happiness to those around me. What thing shall I break open in order to have meaningful change? Still teetering on a rock about that one.